mom
I love the way you love
warm folding of laundry
soft fuzzy robes
drying dishes, the game of where
to put them
you rubbing my hands and feet
always present for me
here beyond memory
so let synapses misfire
let brains tinder the fire of smiling hearts
I thought Alzheimer’s was a fire burning away at us
until a predilection to leave the essential untouched
became infinitely obvious
burning away instead the noisy distance
that too-busy charade
our frustration, guilt, shame, regret, fear, anger, contempt
even sorrow
mine yours ours
until they fade into background:
dust bunnies
ember elves
shadow puppets
former selves
I was so then
so blind
Alzheimer’s is not a flame to burn us
we are the flame
we release demons
set them in boats
kick their sterns and cut their ropes
we set then adrift
here in the now
you become hearth fire
I become sky
at ease within all dis-ease
just us again
like always
giggling above the laundry